My Friend! Welcome!
Well, don't just stand there, come on in...
I'm sorry.
What was I thinking?
I almost forgot who I was.
Let me start again.
My Lords, Ladies and Gentlemen,
Allow me to present my nation's home on the Internet.
Welcome to the realm of Britain's good sense, reason, sense of humour, spelling, stiff upper lip, emotional inadequacy, residual Imperial arrogance and, yes, prejudice.
Well? Come in then!
Did you mother never tell you it was bad form to keep your host waiting?